Just wanted to send a note wishing everyone good luck making it out of this apocalypse. May your feet be swift to escape the rushing lava, and may your arms shield you from the torrential downpour of acidic rain. Goshspeed.
-Justin J. Johnson, December 21, 2012
For your viewing eyes, a classic. Rigor Tortoise present: An Important Message From Santa. I’ll answer all the questions you have right now…yes it was tough playing a flying penguin.
Hello!
In case you didn’t know, I LOVE Yahoo! Answers. And as I’ve said before, it’s probably the only good thing that’s come out of the creation of the Internet.
Don’t believe me? Well get this, you ask a question, and then whackjobs answer it! THERE IS NOTHING BETTER! Thus, given my obsession, I finally decided to create an account to get to the bottom of some things that have been itching my brain. Here’s my second question, “What religious affiliation does Santa have?” Click on the link below to log-in and answer!
Here’s the copy of my question:
What religious affiliation does Santa have?
I assumed that he was Catholic. One could definitely assume that, but after much thought and seeing photos of Santa hat’s that may or may not have been hiding a Yarmulke I wasn’t sure. Then there was the thought that we may be Buddhist giving the come and go of the season.
Hey You Jokers! Check it out, Rigor Tortoise featured on Cracked.com. So go over there and leave a negative (orrrr positive) comment already!
Hey! Check out this short I wrote and am in. Merry Christmas and/or everything else!
Why call this a demo? I’m not sure, I’m sure not going to be able to keep pace any better, or play any better. Regardless, here’s a cut from what could be a potential X-mas album…we’ll see! Possum in My Christmas Tree!
Apparently Any Schmuck Can Get a Giraffe!
Oh man! Remember last week when I told you Yahoo! Answers was unreal? Remember when I posted a ridiculous question and assumed somebody would answer it? Well guess what, I WAS RIGHT! Annnnd, apparently giraffes are super easy to import into the United States BUT they do reproduce. Here’s the text as seen below:
“Most subspecies are not endangered, but many are protected. A helicopter doesn’t have the range, and the cost would be ridiculous. Air and ship are the most likely. Check with a zoo. They can probably tell you, and they could also tell you if any are available already in the US for a suitable use, such as a wildlife preserve or another zoo. They do reproduce”
Hello!
I love Yahoo! Answers. I mean, let’s face it, it’s probably the only good thing that’s come out of the creation of the Internet.
Don’t believe me? Well get this, you ask a question, and then whackjobs answer it! THERE IS NOTHING BETTER! Thus, given my obsession, I finally decided to create an account to get to the bottom of some things that have been itching my brain. Here’s my first question, “How Do You Import Giraffes Into the United States?” Click on the link below to log-in and answer!
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20121121083118AANlIrz
Enjoy the timeless Rigor Tortoise short, “‘Twas the Night Before Thanksgiving.”
